Hot Dad Club

I'm Nicolas Cage, Nicolas Cage is me.

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perspectave:

i can’t wait until i’m older and have a serious relationship like think of how much fun that would be every single night would be like a sleepover with your best friend and you could make pancakes at 3 in the morning and uncontrollably snuggle when you’re bored  

Sep 24 2014



animalaspects:

animalaspects:

Here are some wonderful facts about Sea World’s orcas!

  • The average lifespan of wild orcas ranges from 30-50 years, although some females can easily make it past 80 (a wild orca named J2 or ‘Granny’ is 103 this year!). The lifespan of a Sea World orca is around 25 years, the median age being 9. But at least they put on a good show!
  • Don’t worry, collapsed dorsal fins are a common condition, although in the wild only sick or injured orcas have collapsed dorsal fins. All of Sea World’s males and some females have it, it makes them look unique! 
  • The size of Sea World’s tanks compared to an orca is about the same as a human to a bathtub. Lot’s of room to stretch and move!
  • Wild orcas swim 100+ miles a day, they would have to swim around their tank 1,400+ times a day to achieve that. But that seems like a lot of work, and you may see the animals hanging out near the surface of the water or on the bottoms of their tanks for hours. That’s a lot more relaxing than swimming all those miles!
  • Sea World gives their orcas a Valium-like drug to stop the whales from acting aggressively towards each other and to numb their minds from their vastly uninteresting concrete tanks. Buying a ticket to Sea World is an excellent way to help them pay for these drugs that they pump their animals full with!
  • Many captive orcas show abnormal behaviors like head bobbing, chewing on concrete, and self mutilation by banging their heads into the side of the tank. Obviously just temper-tantrums! Silly things.
  • In the wild, there has been only one orca attack. Bad orca! While in captivity, there have been over 100 attacks and 4 deaths. These animals just need more training, it couldn’t possibly be related to their confinement! 
  • Food is used as reinforcement for tricks. Do a trick, get your dinner. Don’t want to do a trick? I guess you don’t eat tonight you stubborn thing! 

See? Sea World isn’t as bad as people make it out to be! Oh, one more fact: for every $1,000,000 Sea World makes, about $600 goes into conservation efforts (about $0.5 a ticket). I’m so glad they care about conservation of the ocean! Amazing work!

Sources: (x) (x) (x) (x)

If you haven’t realized it yet, this post is 100% sarcastic. It should be obvious, but not everyone understands sarcasm…

Please don’t let this die




  • me: i am actually so happy with my life right now for once
  • next day: *everything fucks up*




hyperlink37:

talents include looking 12 and saying thank you to the bus driver




hoodbypussy:

Évolution inversée

“It took me four years to paint like Raphael, but a lifetime to paint like a child.”
― Pablo Picasso




"I think it was Danneel who took this one of us…" x



he-is-lightning-in-a-bottle:

Private Pat-Down! [x]

Holy shit.




heyitspj:

there are billions of planets and galaxies and stars and life forms in our universe and some people believe there are only two genders







whatanawfulsound:

I want you to listen to this then look me in the eye and tell me this band isn’t fucking legendary





dunshine:

i pretend to be punk rock but im really just a vaguely emo indie pop kid who loves fall out boy a lot




satan-chan:

Incredible cosplay




I need a nap and an orgasm.

— An Ancient Proverb, probably (via thegreatmadman)





kobetyrant:

the word “hoe” gets thrown around way too loosely I did not religiously suck dick to share that title with you virgins running a porn blog




methhomework:

the fault within our star was so romantic